sometimes, there aren't necessarily words to describe how i feel. and i don't know why i feel the way i am feeling. sometimes i don't understand myself, or know exactly how to fix it. sometimes, i wish i wasn't the way that i am. and that i could fix everything about me that doesn't work right, and make it function. sometimes, i wish i could understand why people don't understand me when i feel like i am trying so hard to communicate how i feel to them. sometimes, i just wanna scream and then just sit in my bed all day until the feelings go away. but i know that won't do any good. so i will try and fix it myself. because sometimes, you have to be your own hero. sometimes, there won't be anybody out there who can understand you or who cares enough to try. sometimes, there are moments when you feel so alone and the only one that can save you, is yourself. because you don't know how or what you are feeling and so therefore you don't have a way for them to fix it. you just have to get over it and grow up a little bit. you have to smile and try to forget those feelings because they are damaging to you, and someone else. sometimes you just have to accept it, be happy for them, and move on in the hopes that one person will still care about you when it's all over. but sometimes, that is really scary. and sometimes, it is really hard.
it's raining outside today. i love when i can wake up to weather that matches my mood.
it is one of those pathetic fallacies that fascinates me.
maybe i will run around in the rain today.